Sunday, April 4, 2010

My Goals

Well, I'm starting to feel very frustrated with myself. I've always struggled with self esteem issues. In high school I went through a lot, as I am sure every high school girl has dealt with a bit. I don't want to get into everything I went through because it was in the past and it won't help me move forward to rehash it. I've changed a lot since high school and my confidence has grown, but not to where I'd like it to be and I have been analyzing WHY it isn't where I want it to be and a lot boils down to my appearance. Now, I don't consider myself ugly, but I don't see myself as beautiful. I am coming off of a "fat WEEK" (not just fat day), and my self esteem really took a hit this week. I also think that the weight I put on since high school may have an effect on our fertility problems, although they probably aren't the entire source, but it isn't helping!

So here it goes. I am adding to my blog. I plan on blogging about my progress. I plan on blogging about going to the gym and my workout routines, etc. I plan on blogging about the extras I do on top of going to the gym (ie walking the dogs, working in the garden, hiking, golfing, playing sports, etc). I will also blog about some of the healthier things that I eat. I can't promise that I will change 100% of how I eat because my husband is going to be hard to change. He holds strong to being a meat and potatoes kind of guy, so we will see how I can do with the eating thing. If anything, I will narrow down portions, and make most of my snacking good snacking (though I'm a chocoholic, but I will be limiting myself to one small piece a day) and try to make my lunches very healthy. I will also be blogging about my downfalls. What did I do that day that took me two steps back from where I was? I think it will help to hold me accountable.

I also have goal to run a 5k in the fall. I shared about this goal in the past and it is still real. I had a few downfalls with the gym. I was very faithful and then student teaching threw me for a loop and my schedule was 100% out of whack! Then I got back into it and sprained my ankle. Now I am back. I will be working up to running... I am walking for 20 minutes on the treadmill very fast a day, plus doing some lifting. I hope soon I will extend it to 30 minutes on the treadmill. And then start to run. And hopefully work it up to a 5k length so that I know I can at least endure running that long. Oh, did I mention I *HATE* to run????? But I have to do it! I know I do!

I am doing this for my husband, so he can have a healthy wife. I am doing it for my family to have a healthy family member. I am doing it for my angel in heaven and my future children, so they can have a healthy mother. But most of all I am doing it for ME!

Please support me!

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